Pyke Syndicate
  2152 active members
  148 are Online

Year

25

Day

123

Time

22:35:06

Guest
Login
Welcome to the Galactic News Service
TriNebulon News Presents: The Weekly Happenstance Episode 4
Hacked by: Ulrike Rayne Schultheiss, TriNebulon News
Date: Year 18 Day 98 Location Unknown
trineb_log.png
shamus_harmsbalm.png
 
Welcome to TriNebulon News Presents: The Weekly Happenstance! I'm Shamus Harmsfeld covering for Chester Manclover who is out sick today, bringing you the news of the last 2 weeks for the people of today! We apologize for the large gap between broadcasts. We've been dealing with some difficulties relating to the Kate Feldspar murder including multiple of our writers being taken away in Gree Sector Police custody. For shame, if I do say so myself. Which I do.
 
INCOMPETENCE STRIKES AS GALAXY WIDE COORDINATED DATACARD LOOTING SHAKES MANUFACTURING TO ITS CORE! Earlier this week, multiple production companies announced that their datacards had gone missing overnight. In what can only be called the greatest heist of this century, hundreds of thousands of smaller companies were left without datacard access after a coordinated group of super thieves stole a large portion of datacards from providers and major production companies.
 
Many companies were negatively impacted by this attack on capitalism, some of which have now announced that they're going out of business due to the heist. One such group is Ailon Nova Guard. This company, known for leasing out its massive supply of datacards, apparently operated on razor-thin margins due to incompetence at the highest level in the group, leading to them not only having to close shop but also being entirely unable to provide compensation to their customers. While usually, this sort of thing would warrant an investigation, the galactic government currently isn't probing into the situation.
 
Another such group, The Ashla Covenant, was largely impacted by this massive heist as well. However, while they lost many datacards in the situation, it appears they were more set up to deal with such losses and so far haven't announced any plans to shut down. We're unsure of if they'll be issuing refunds at this time, but we'll keep you up to date as soon as we have some information! While we sympathize with the groups negatively impacted by this, this just goes to show you can't trust anyone, even some of your most loyal employees. It's also a good sign not to invest in a single form of income, lest ye be screwed when the inevitable villain comes pounding at the door. Hopefully, the companies that aren't immediately shutting down are able to recover and prosper after such a horrible incident.
 
Now I hand you off to our newest anchor, twin sister of Kate Fallensparrow... KATHERINE FELLSWORLD! Here's to you, Kate... Erhm... I mean Katherine! She's definitely not Kate. Kate died.
 
kather_feldini.png
 
Thanks, Shamus!
 
SHENANIGANS ENSUE! A few weeks ago we ran a story on The Krath Empire's public execution of Varro Belle. While the story was well received, it brought a lot of hate our way and lead to many claims that we were biased against the Galactic Alliance. This simply isn't true. We target all groups regardless of affiliation. The problem is that the Galactic Alliance has more shenanigans happening in it than any other galactic scale alliance to date!
 
With that said, the original story brought some of the craziest individuals out of the woodworks who do, in fact, have a grudge against The Illustrious Krath Empire. In particular, one mister, or missus, we're not entirely sure on that one, Shakka Flakka Shame Galor contacted us with some "information" about the Varro, incorrectly labeled as Belle by Chester during the original broadcast, situation. The information brought to light was that another individual was involved with the betrayal. That individual was none other than Kalzel Gryjiss.
 
Kalzel, who had appeared to be just as much a part of the assault on the Empire's sovereignty, was given leniency after going to the high council and repenting for his transgressions. Most governments wouldn't do such a thing for someone that assisted in the murder of multitudes of high-ranking officials, nor would they allow the individual to assist in the final execution of their partner. HOWEVER, after investigating the holograms further, we came to learn that they had been doctored.
 
The holograms started with Varro contacting Shakka, giving him a list of prisoners and saying that he'd be recruiting Kalzel into the cause. Under the guise of being on a mission from Krath to expose Talak Kasra and others as an Imperial spyVarro convinced Kalzel to join with him in his devious mission. Kalzel chose to believe Varro, having no reason not to at that time and assisted with some of the attacks. HOWEVER, after realizing Varro's true intentions, albeit too late to prevent it, Kalzel immediately turned himself over to the high council as a show of good will toward the government he so willingly served.
 
We were originally under the impression that Kalzel had assisted in stealing assets and murdering individuals, but it turns out that this is at least partially false. While he did assist with some of the executions, this was while he was under the assumption that he was doing work for the high council as passed down by a superior. It was not out of malice toward the government he so willingly served.
 
On another unrelated, we do not take lying to us in an effort to discredit us lightly, ShakkaWe are unforgiving. We are uncaring. We are unhinged. Keep that in mind the next time you attempt to feed us unfactual information. We won't be so kind to you for your transgressions next time.
 
NEW SPORTSBALL GAME TAKING THE GALAXY BY STORM! The game known as Boloball has picked up the pace lately on the planet of Corellian, leading to the formation of the Galactic Boloball League. The Galactic Boloball League recently started its first tournament called the Corellian Cup in which a total of 6 teams are currently competing. The teams hail from all over the galaxy and are currently located on Corellia until the end of the season. We're going to keep you up to date with this sportsball event as it progresses, as well as get you scores starting next week!
 
Thanks for watching, everyone! And we hope you tune in to next week's episode of... TriNebulon News Presents: The Weekly Happenstance! Ta now!
Hot Shot Bounties

WANTED: Dead or Alive

Henryetta Rico rico.png

250M alive, 200M dead (Anonymous)

WANTED: Dead

Crane Baxa baxa.png

150M dead (Anonymous)

WANTED: Alive

Van Kaydden 1460780-100-100.jpg?1431746134

50M alive (Anonymous)

 
Happy hunting, Space Cow Boys!

[Main Page]
Events in Brief
Year 25 Day 123: Czerka Mining and Industrial was dissolved today due to bankruptcy.
Year 25 Day 122: The Whisperers Network was dissolved today.
Year 25 Day 121: Grim Tech Group was dissolved today due to bankruptcy.