::Forum - Typos in descriptions? - Star Wars Combine::

Year 6 Day 98 7:12	Typos in descriptions?
Gawayne	I'm not sure if this is the proper forum for such a trivial thing, but I've found typos in a planet's description. If this is the proper place, I'll continue posting here if and when I find any more. “Planet: Abrath System: Abrath Sector: Jospro ” ... “Description: This planet found in the Abrath system of the Jaspro ” should read "Jospro" “ sector is home to the ancestor of the Kryat ” should read "Krayt" “Dragon. Although you may not find jewels in its belly, you will find many other creatures. The Manteca Dragon is around 25 meters long as well as 10 meters wide. Manteca, Bothan for Lard, has more fat rolls on its belly than Incipent has bounties. It moves at a slow speed of .1 km/hour and is no threat to life when compared to its other family members. It has large teeth, however it does not eat meat, rather rocks and dirt. On this planet ” add a "," (comma) here? “which is filled with Canyons, mountains and Boulders, ” downcase to "canyons, mountains and boulders," “this species thrives. Bothans scouted this planet out several hundred years ago, ” no comma needed “and found that the planet was quite large. They settled a small base near the nothern cliffs of Los Precipicios elevados, the towering cliffs. ” should probably continue capitalisation: "Los Precipicios Elevados, The Towering Cliffs." for it being a proper noun “ There they discovered the Manteca Dragons. They captured several and ” comma needed “due to a hyperspace glitch, they ” drop the "they" “found themselves exactly on the otherside of the galaxy, Tantoinee. ” should read "Tatooine" ?? “They crashed landed and the Dragons escaped. It did not take long for the Matecas ” should read "Mantecas" “to adapt to the climate, simmiliar ” should read "similar" “to their own. However Tantooine ” again, "Tatooine" “did not have the proper food for the dragons, and they evolved in to faster, more dangerous animals, ” no comma needed “and began to eat on other creatures. ” I'm not trying to be nitpicky, but ... all this made it hard to read ... not mentally, just ... ::feels around for words:: ... i dunno. Let's just try to be more careful when submitting descriptions and proofread before sending. Funny thing is, I didn't even notice all those grammatical errors until I went to quote out the two Tatooine ones ... going through the entire descrip, I noticed it was worse than at first glance. If there's another forum I should be posting this in, please reply or send me an ingame msg and I'll post it there instead.

Year 6 Day 98 9:29	Typos in descriptions?
Teniel Djo	This is a fine place to post it, I can fix it up now, or if you want to post the new "cleaned-up" version of the description (As a single copy/pastable paragraph with your changes made), I'll actually reward more CPs >.> ____________

Year 6 Day 98 10:03	Typos in descriptions?
Gawayne	This planet found in the Abrath system of the Jospro sector is home to the ancestor of the Krayt Dragon. Although you may not find jewels in its belly, you will find many other creatures. The Manteca Dragon is around 25 meters long as well as 10 meters wide. Manteca, Bothan for Lard, has more fat rolls on its belly than Incipent has bounties. It moves at a slow speed of .1 km/hour and is no threat to life when compared to its other family members. It has large teeth, however it does not eat meat, rather rocks and dirt. On this planet, which is filled with canyons, mountains and boulders, this species thrives. Bothans scouted this planet out several hundred years ago, and found that the planet was quite large. They settled a small base near the nothern cliffs of Los Precipicios Elevados, The Towering Cliffs. There they discovered the Manteca Dragons. They captured several and, due to a hyperspace glitch, found themselves exactly on the otherside of the galaxy, Tatooine. They crashed landed and the Dragons escaped. It did not take long for the Mantecas to adapt to the climate, similar to their own. However Tatooine did not have the proper food for the dragons, and they evolved in to faster, more dangerous animals and began to eat on other creatures.

Year 6 Day 98 10:51	Typos in descriptions?
Teniel Djo	updated, CPs awarded. :) If you find any more problems, or want to write your own planet descriptions for various planets, just use this thread rather than creating a new one. (Or better...just use the eMail) ____________

	Year	Day	Time
	14	202	19:46:03

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