-IMBRAANI, QUIILURA

Lub Quish, your favorite naughty Ishi Tib, reporting from Imbraani where today the citizens have gathered to hear an announcement from the leadership of Ailon Nova Guard, a powerful company whose future has been in doubt recently. Here is what I have learned from internal sources:

Ailon Nova Guard has left the manufacturing business and returned to its roots, once again becoming the premier mercenary organization in the galaxy. This move had been in the works for several months and is in no way related to the much-publicized datacard theft that occurred recently. One of the reclusive leaders of Ailon Nova Guard, Grand Admiral Lorenzas Atticus, did not speak publicly but will be quoted by his press secretary Peter McGee, who has now appeared in the veranda in front of a phalanx of Guardians. Let us see what Mr. McGee has to say.

“Welcome, and what a wonderful day it is on Qiilura! Let us all celebrate life and the continued advancement of the Guard into its destiny as the most powerful independent force in the galaxy! Grand Admiral Atticus is on an important mission today, but I have and important message from him to you, all of his devoted citizens”

Peter grinned as he looked from the holocamera to the teleprompter and out to the crowd of Ailon citizens."Once again Ailon Nova Gua

rd is what it was initially meant to be, a military force to depended on by our friends and feared by those who oppose us. Several years ago, we left behind the yoke of governmental bureaucracy and turned to ship production, which eventually mutated into general manufacturing but, contrary to popular belief, profit was never our goal. Since I took command of this organization we have tripled the size of our military, which was already the biggest non-governmental navy in the galaxy but now rivals the forces of all but the largest governments.  Finally we are free to pursue our true goal, which is to stamp out tyranny and injustice anywhere it occurs, and to help those who cannot defend themselves against the villains and scum of the galaxy."

McGee also addressed the datacard debacle that recently affected several manufacturing organizations, "It is true we were operating on a skeleton crew at Ailon Nova Guard during the recent datacard looting that occurred throughout the galaxy and this may have contributed to the fact we were targeted. But we want to set the record straight on why we were short-staffed. A few months ago we accepted a contract valued at roughly 10 billion credits to build cities for a prominent government. In order to fulfill our obligations, The 39th Fleet - Omega, The 42nd Fleet - Soaring Eagles, The 44th Fleet - Bones Brigade, and The 72nd Fleet - Shadow Wolves were dispatched to this government’s territory in order to build these cities. Our Guardians left on contract temporarily with that government which left us with a skeleton crew back home."

"Unfortunately, these cyber-thieves targeted us during the time we were most vulnerable, causing us to lose three of our seven datacards. Although we issued a public statement apologizing to our customers who potentially lost datacard uses due to the theft, once we completed a thorough examination of our books we discovered that zero customers were affected by the incedent. Due to the fact that all of the military datacards we possessed and traded for were used to build ships, weapons and armor that we had always intended to keep, only our space yacht datacard rentals were affected and it turned out that none of our valued customers had unused datacards at the time of the theft."

"Ailon Nova Guard is here to help those in need. We can be in your system in a moment’s notice equipped to exterminate any unwanted vermin that you cannot remove on your own. Please do not hesitate to contact us for any mercenary work you may require."

Questions remain within Ailon Nova Guard’s territory of what has become of one of its other reclusive leaders. Breaking news suggests that a powerful jedi master of the Nova Guard has been spotted a couple months ago in an undisclosed location, a damp planet which she had not left for years in her contemplation of the galaxy, the Guard, and the Force. My sources tell me that there is enough local plant and animal life in the area to enable a solitary being with survival skills to survive until old age. Alas, the hermitess appeared to be in such a peaceful state that our scouts chose not to interview her in favor of her continued meditation. Rumor has it that since this spotting, she has disappeared from her wilderness hideout, but it possible my sources are wrong or she is simply is hiding.

This is Lub Quish, first with fair and biased news from Ailon Nova Guard Space, signing off. Until next time, toodles!